Tuesday, April 24, 2018

3 Steps to Choosing What Matters

My life is full of choices lately. Since my sweet spouse retired, my life has changed, and I’ve been forced to reassess what was becoming a comfortable life for me.

Karl has been retired for about nine months now.  The transition from full-time employment to retirement has been a slow one for him, as it has been for me. In fact, I’m still not ready to say that I’m retired in the traditional sense of the word.  I am still actively coaching and training, with some heavy volunteer work on the side. Karl, on the other hand, is seeking the “old” definition of retirement.  Slow days, with a large amount of play, and some volunteer work.  He also decided early this year that we will be snow-birds so we can spend more time being physically active outside, and I can spend more time with my Dad and Shirley.

My choices revolve around the idea of being gone for four to six months at a time. We will be away from friends, family, our home (now both ways), and the work I do that requires me to be physically present. How do I resolve the inner conflict that has come about because of my life partner’s change in employment status and his desires for this time of his life?

I followed a relatively easy process to create the foundation  I needed to think clearly, and then did some deep soul-searching.  This works for me, and may work for you when faced with life changes that turn your world upside down. I chose to:

  • Review my core values and my intentions for this time of my life to see if there were any significant changes from the last time I worked on them.
  • Review my personal mission statement to see if it applied to this new vision of our lives together, and as individuals.
  • Map out my desired activities and looked at all the possibilities available to me to continue doing what I love, and being with who I love.

Because I’m a very visual person, this took the form of a mind-map, and eventually a vision board I could refer back to on a daily or weekly basis.

My goal was to focus on the dissonance to gain clarity over what was disturbing me.  I know that when I am feeling fractured in some way that what is going on around me, and within me, is not aligned with who I am and who I am willing to be. By taking the time to follow this often arduous process, I was able to discern alternatives to me being physically present and still continue to do what I love, and be with the people I care about, while maintaining my intentions to be all I desire to be.

Retirement does not mean giving up who you are, and what you want from life.  It simply means we get to do more of it, often in different ways. One of my favorite communicators says, “Life is curly”.  And so it is.  It’s up to us to transition with it.

Georgia Feiste, President of Collaborative Transitions Coaching, Inc., located in Lincoln, NE, is a personal growth and leadership coach, writer, and workshop facilitator.  She is also a Usui Reiki Master and EFT practitioner.  Her passion is success grounded in purpose and passion, standards of integrity and priorities in life.  You can also find Georgia on her website, Collaborative Transitions, Twitter, LinkedIn and Facebook.   Georgia may also be reached at (402) 304-1902 if you wish to schedule a 30 minute complementary consultation.

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One Response to “3 Steps to Choosing What Matters”
  1. Scott Mabry says:

    Really enjoyed the post. Helpful for me during a time of transition! Thank you.
    Scott Mabry recently posted..Extreme Leadership

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